Today’s email is a remix of one of our greatest hits, originally sent July 8, 2024. Enjoy.
“There is only one cause of unhappiness: the false beliefs you have in your head.” – Anthony de Mello
Here’s a list of realizations that are depressing in the short term, but will make you happier in the long-term:
You can’t fix everything.
Some problems will not be solved in your lifetime; you will live with them forever.
Whether this bothers you or not is up to you.
Love isn’t enough.
Falling in love doesn’t mean it’ll work out, just like doing what you love doesn’t mean money will follow.
If you thought a happy ending was guaranteed, welcome to the wrong fairytale.
Neither is hard work.
Working really, really hard doesn’t mean you’ll make it, and neither does “working smart.”
The truth is:
You might just not be good enough.
Genetics are a b*tch.
And, in case we forgot to add insult to injury:
Suffering doesn’t end.
If you’re expecting to wake up one day with all of your problems solved, stay in bed.
(Finer point for the advanced: You can transcend suffering, but you can’t get rid of it; to transcend means to include and go beyond, not to remove. Apologies, Buddhists).
Well, damn.
That… sucks?
Maybe.
Before we go walking into the ocean with rocks in our pockets, there’s a catch:
None of this is a problem.
Reality ‘aint got no problems; she’s been running this show a lot longer than we’ve been playing it.
Problems aren’t a reality thing, they’re a human thing:
A thing we create by expecting reality be different than it is.
If we expect the sky to be green, we’ll have a problem every time we look up — and it won’t be the sky’s fault, it’ll be ours.
So, while the childhood move is to wish reality to be as we want it to be…
The adult move is to meet reality as it is so we can deal with it productively.
You still might not get what you wanted, but you’ll be happier for it.
- T
P.S. I know this message lands in the deep end of the tough-love spectrum, but if the truth hurts, then pain is our ally.
If you enjoyed, here’s more:
This Depressing Video Will Make You Happier
Also:
Our next email will land on Tuesday next week.
Taking a few days to unplug and lock in on our retreat here in the Amazon.
Chat with you then.
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