Blog
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Am I the only alien in town?
“The game rewards the player who needs no reward other than the game itself.” – DeepGame
Last night, I started watching season 2 of the Netflix show Starting 5.
So far, pretty solid.
Haliburton’s got year-round kid-on-Xmas energy, and James looks like he’s two blunts away from brain-dead. KD is KD, and Jalen Brown’s fight training was a surprising bright spot for me.
But the star of the show is, undeniably, SGA.
And near the end of the first episode, he dropped a line that made me rewind and write it down:
“I am very obsessed with the game of basketball.
But in general, I think more than anything I’m obsessed with the feeling of getting better at something.”
- Shai Gilgeous-Alexander, 2025 NBA MVP
Now, that comment may sound generic, on the surface.
But to my ear, it’s about as novel an idea as there is in the modern world.
As far as I can tell…
Most people want to grow / get better / develop themselves in order to get something:
More money, more status, more pillow talk from prettier pillow talkers.
And fair enough, I’m not immune to pretty pillow talkers either.
But still, that chain of motivation…
Goal Growth necessary for goal Tolerate growth process in order to achieve goal
…Has always felt foreign, to me.
In basketball, the process of training — of pushing the limits of my body and skill set, and creating a stronger, more evolved version of myself — was always more fun than playing.
(I was one of those weird players who enjoyed offseason training more than I enjoyed the season itself)
In business, the process of sharpening my craft — of becoming a better writer, communicator, and thinker; of building better products based on deeper ideas — was always more inspiring than making money.
(I don’t create to make money, I make money to fuel my creativity and pursuit of mastery)
And, in my self-development, spirituality, and plant medicine work:
My goal has never been to “fix myself” or to “feel better”.
It’s the raw experience of personal evolution — of unbinding, unlocking, and unleashing deeper and deeper versions of myself — that drives me to do all the crazy sh*t I do.
In the words of SGA:
I am, more than anything else, obsessed with the process of getting better.
External goals — basketball, business, body, relationships, etc — are just the fuel I feed into that process.
In the world we live in, that often makes me feel like an alien.
Which is why SGA’s comment felt so refreshing, when I heard it.
Of course, I know I’m not the only alien in town…
(you’re reading this, after all)
….But it’s nice to be reminded, once in a while.
So if this message lands with you, I’d love it if you replied and let me know.
Feel free to quick-reply “lands” — or, say more if you feel like it.
I’ll read every reply personally.
In the meantime, have an awesome weekend over there.
You deserve it.
T
P.S. Plus, here are…
3 things to make your weekend betterWhat to read, watch, and learn from this weekend…
How Fate & Karma Actually Work
A clip from one of my favorite retreat sessions this summer. Went live earlier this week.
The Deep Game of Mixed Martial Arts
Incredible mini-doc on UFC fighter Cory Sandhagen, who is one of the deepest-thinking athletes I’ve ever come across. Highly, highly recommended (esp. the line at 5:28 — gold).
Grace & Grit by Ken Wilber
I just started reading this for the second time. It’s not a book to take lightly; the story is incredibly raw, intense, and sometimes scary — but profoundly beautiful and deeply rewarding for those who approach it with care. Ken Wilber is a legend who has been writing on human potential for nearly 50 years. And this is, very likely, the most unique book he’s ever written.
“The great and rare mystics of the past . . . were, in fact, ahead of their time, and are still ahead of ours. In other words, they most definitely are not figures of the past. They are figures of the future.” – Ken Wilber
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Check your head, check on your people
It’s that time of the year where everyone talks about mental health.
The thing is. Your mental health isn’t some weird optional maintenance.
You need to truly look after it.
You wouldn’t ignore a broken bone or a persistent cough, but somehow we’ve normalised walking around with fractured minds and emotional exhaustion.
Take the therapy. Use the medication if you need it. Sleep more than four hours. Eat something that didn’t come from a vending machine. Move your body occasionally. Talk to someone who isn’t your reflection in the bathroom mirror after waking up 13 times before 4:16am…
…and while you’re sorting your own head out, check on your people.
That friend who’s been unusually quiet? Text them.
That colleague making self deprecating jokes that hit a little too close to home?
Actually listen…
Depression lies. Anxiety lies. Mental illness tells people they’re burdens when they’re struggling. Sometimes the simple act of reaching out reminds someone they matter.
“Hey, thinking about you” takes five seconds to send and might save someone’s entire week.
Your brain matters. Their brain matters. Take care of both.
Stephen Walker.
P.S. If you ever want to reach out when things are getting heavy. Send me a text or a whatsapp on +447710505825, I got you.
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Stephen Walker, Unit 146317, PO Box 7169, Poole, BH15 9EL, United Kingdom
