It has been exactly zero days since the last time I enjoyed a zoom call filled with people who have made data and analytics their personality type…
Spent the whole day on and off in various zoom calls of the corporate type.
I was having flashbacks and it felt like a fever dream unfolding.
The world outside my window’s gone to shit.
Locked up tighter than a nun’s chastity belt, we’re all slaves to the glowing sadness rectangles now. Fuck me sideways if I didn’t see this coming. Every morning, I hook my brain into the Zoom-o-matic 3000, feeling those sweet, sweet oligarch electrons coursing through my synapses.
It’s a hit of digital crack, and I’m jonesing hard.
“Good morning, team!” chirps my boss, her face a pixelated mask of corporate cheer.
I want to vomit, but my fingers are too busy dancing across the keyboard, typing bullshit reports about nothing.
Days bleed into nights, weeks into months. The only difference between Tuesday and Saturday is the flavour of microwaved crap I shovel into my face-hole. Sometimes, I catch a glimpse of the outside world. Trees swaying in the breeze, birds singing their carefree songs. Bastards.
Don’t they know we’re all fucked?
But then the Zoom call dings yet again, and I’m pulled back into the matrix of meaningless meetings and forced smiles. It’s almost comforting now.
God help us all.
Then the world goes back to normal and we aren’t waiting to witness an all out catastrophe.
Yet the world has changed a lot more. We’ve become hyper fixated on social media. Twitter, Tiktok and Youtube are crack and just like that. Social media has us even deeper in their grips.
And so this is where I make my case for email. These lovely little compilations of words.
It’s like we’re sitting across from each other enjoying a coffee, except we’re not. This has found its way into your inbox and hopefully you’re entertained and whisked out of the dullness that life can sometimes throw our way.
Asides from hand written and typed letters. Emails for me have always been a favourite to way to share insights into my life with others who have opt-ed in to my word shenanigans.
It’s like a blog but it’s not. We’re just having a singular moment as soon as I hit send and then it’s off until tomorrow.
Even though we’ve never met face to face. You might feel like you’ve known for since forever.
This is why I encourage everyone who is either in a creative industry or just want to get away from the toxic cesspool that is social media, to start up their own little news letter.
You’ll learn a lot more about yourself when you’re forcing yourself to write about you, your life and the things that make you tick.
It’s a hell of a lot better than spending hours scrolling through the brain rotting abyss that is social media.
Stephen Walker